Good Madness

38 Week Doctor's Appointment (and Ultrasound)

Today was probably the day of one of our last doctor's visits. If we have any more we won't have more than 3.

Today Dr. Taylor examined me and told us that I am 1.5 cm dilated and 50% effaced! I have already lost my mucus plug (I had no idea), and we're now basically on-call. She could come quickly (anything this week or weekend) or slowly (all the way up to the 2nd)... but regardless we are being induced on August 2nd. At the most we'll have baby-in-belly for only 2 more weeks!

The doctor did a great job of describing what "effaced" means -- cause I wasn't sure. To put it in layman's terms:  Bria is half way (50%) down into my cervix. When I am 100% effaced she will have dropped to compensate all of my cervix. At that point I will probably also be 10 cm dilated. Once she is 100% effaced and I'm 10 cm dilated, all I'll have to do is push her out!

We know her current weight but that could definitely change depending on much longer she stays inside. I'm not spilling the beans just yet because I want everyone to have a fair chance if they're gonna guess her birth weight. :) Only Clue: my birth weight was 6lbs 5oz. and Michael was 9lbs 8oz. Good luck all you betters!

We also had our last ultrasound. The purpose was to measure her and weigh her, check out her organs, see how her lungs are workin, etc. Everything looks great, amniotic fluid level is good, her size is wonderful. We weren't expecting to get pictures to take home with us but our ultrasound tech was super sweet and gave us these:

Check out her chubby cheeks!!!! Love <3 That's all I can say.

I'm feeling pretty good. I have definitely felt a difference within the past few days; it's not just that she's dropped but I'm more uncomfortable (especially when I sit). It's nothing to complain about.

Whereas some women may fear and dread the actual event of childbirth, I'm pretty calm about it. I know that the experience itself (pain, possible complications, discomfort, after-effects) are all things that I can't help, control, or change. The negatives will be FAR outweighed by the positives. I know that I can get thru it and all of the negatives will equal my baby girl. Which is what I want the most.

What stresses me out more than childbirth is the current unknowns of our lives. I won't go into detail here but basically there are still a lot of things that need to be done and I don't have enough time in the day to do them all. To the people who may cause me stress: I really have no time to deal with this extra baggage. NO TIME. I am REALLY learning to eliminate the unnecessary problems that I'm dealing with and although it may seem selfish to throw the towel in, in some circumstances, I'm looking after my baby more than anything else.

To everyone who can't get a hold of me, or who may feel left out of my loop: I'm sorry but I really and truly can't talk to everyone. Every day at work I am training two people at once and I get a 1 hr lunch break. During this time I am busy trying to solve the other issues in my life. If we start talking on the phone and if I have to go all of a sudden, it's not because I don't cherish our conversation but I really HAVE GOT TO GO. I'm trying my hardest to spread myself between everyone but its completely obvious to me that I can't. Even the most important people (Michael, my mom, and his parents) don't get my undivided attention. I tried calling my mom 5+ times today and EACH time I had to let her go. I have three people asking me to call them in the mornings, and I can't call everyone every morning. So, to everyone else, please just be understanding.

I'm grateful for those people who ARE understanding and who ARE helping us in EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. I appreciate (to the point of tears) what everyone is doing for us. I'm trying my hardest not to treat those that I love the most, the worst. I'm sorry if I get a little cranky.

As an end note: I love my family. It's overwhelming how much I love Michael and Bria (and our parents, and our extended family members)... and she isn't even here yet. I don't know how this love can get any bigger, but I'm EXCITED to see it grow. :)